Friday, July 29, 2011

How I Became Feral

Morning y`all! Drop on down and we`ll share a pot.

It`s come to me that quite a few of my blogging buddies and friends have been wondering how I became Feral Female. Quite a few folks have asked me what my username means and how did it come about. Since we all know each other so well now I figured I`d pass along the particulars. It all started with this man-

Oh yeah, that`s Marvel Comics Wolverine, one of my top three favorite comic characters. The first comic I ever read was a Wolverine comic. I can`t recall which one it was now but I was immediately enthralled. And I wasn`t a child of seven or eight at the time either! I was a fully grown woman when I first read a comic book. I had just seen the first of the X-Men movies and after I picked my jaw up off the floor after viewing Hugh Jackman in the role I just had to have more! This was a world that I had never entered before. A world filled with mutants and heroes, villains and people that ran around in spandex and capes and actually looked good in their get-ups!

I did a fast search on local comic book stores and found my man Jared. Of course local up here in the mountains is not what local in the city is. Jared`s shop, Heroes Your Mom Threw Out, which is THE coolest name for a comic shop I`ve ever seen, was close to forty-five minutes away. Didn`t matter though, Mister and I and Miss made the trip one day and my life has never been the same since. I strolled into that cramped little store that was filled with shelves and boxes of comics and I was hooked. I came home that day with a bag full of Wolverine comics and a character I had never heard of before-Deadpool.

Of course those who know me now are fully aware of the love affair that grew between me and the Merc with the Mouth as Deadpool is sometimes referred to. But it didn`t stop with just Wolverine and Deadpool! Oh no, I found myself falling head over heels in love with Tony Stark as well as my love of Marvel comics began to grow. Iron Man quickly flew up to hold a firm spot for first place among my comic hero heartthrob list.

Once I found myself immersed in this realm of comic nerds I was kind of alone. No-one else I knew read comics in our little burg. Mister to this day will maybe pick up a Captain America or a Ghost Rider when they come from Jared in the mail but he`s not into the whole comic scene. Miss is somewhat but aside from my daughter there was not a soul to chat about comics with. So I went to the Marvel boards one day and gave them a quick peek. Lord alive but the place was packed with fellow comic aficionados! I hurried to register and then had to come up with a user name. Well fiddlesticks I thought staring at the registration page. What the heck kind of name can I come up with that would suit me? I thought back to what or who as the case may be, had brought me to this place, and decided to go with Feral Female since Wolverine is sometimes called ‘The Feral One’.

From that point on I`ve been Feral. I`ve had the pleasure of being made a moderator at the Marvel boards and I have to admit that it was writing fan fiction, which I still do heavily, that really opened up the world of writing to me. I`ll guess here and say I became Feral about five years ago. Now it is as much a part of me as my real name. I have friends on Facebook that never call me Vicki, it`s always Feral even though they know my real name! Heck, I answer to Feral just as quickly as I do my given name anymore!

I even went and had a tattoo done on my left bicep to honor the character that had brought so much joy into my life. Logan-James Howlett-Wolverine-Weapon X-Whatever moniker you are using my man, I thank you for not only showing me what a glorious world the world of comic books is but for opening up a whole new persona for me and for allowing me the joy of discovering the written word and all that being a scribe may bring me. Logan has also given me so many wonderful comic friends that I can chatter with daily, and do, about the world of Marvel comics and our regular lives as well. Wolverine, you rock!

So that`s how a farm wife from the hills of PA became a Feral Female. Now I must be off, I smell evil afoot! *Tugs on spandex costume and mask and flies to the door*

Before I take off to apprehend villains I`d like to give a big yodel of welcome to Charlotte Crowley! Thanks for stopping in to visit.

Monday, July 25, 2011

Sunday Morning at the Cow Barn

Good morning everyone! C.B. the cow barn rooster here to tell you about the day we had yesterday. Before I get into the rather rowdy morning we chickens had over at the cow barn I`d like to take a moment to crow just a bit. This is a picture of part of my family.*Puffs up breast feathers* That is me in the background.

I`m very proud of my little chicks and my lovely brides are doing an excellent job of raising them up to be proper young chickens! I must admit being the only rooster in a cow barn filled with hens is a right dandy job!

Okay, now that I`ve boasted enough I`ll get on with the post. Gracious knows what would happen if that goofy goatherder came back from doing chores and found me here at the kitchen table pecking out my story! It wouldn`t be pretty and would involve dumplings I fear! *Shudders*

Sunday morn was a sticky one. Actually it was quite warm all night. I even had to skittle away from one of the wives during the night on the roost to try to cool down. The sun came up early yesterday and although it was quite toasty it wasn`t too terribly bad. I was stretching my wings and trying to decide which of my ladies to impress first when the Kubota tractor roared to life just outside the cow barn. I nearly lost a few tail feathers in fright let me tell you!

It seems that the goatherder and her husband had plans on hauling the large pile of cow bedding to the fields before the heat grew too oppressive. My wives were not impressed to have their beauty sleep interrupted again. Can I help it if I crow in my sleep?? We got down from the roost and hurried outside to see what was going on. The big orange tractor had been pulled right next to the cow barn. Then of course those silly turkeys showed up. One even had thoughts of trying to drive the tractor after eyeing it very closely! Can you imagine the bedlam on our hillside farm if a turkey were behind the wheel of that tractor?! They are very silly birds if I do say so.

The goatherder and her Mister worked very hard and very quickly to get their job done. I spent some time preening and crowing as they worked. I also tried to show the youngest of my peeps how to dig and peck in the fresh dirt under that pile of bedding and cow manure. The bugs are just glorious! You humans really should try them sometime. Fresh maggots and worms for breakfast, yummy!

As I was pecking about I was rudely shuffled aside when Mister Goatherder got off his tractor and opened the sliding door of Sir Patrick of Moo`s barn. Apparently he was giving my friend and sometime resting perch, some fresh hay. Sir Patrick loves hay.

I have tried it a few times, at my bovine friends’ insistence, but it gets caught in my crop so I stick to bugs and scratch grain now. After the manure spreader was filled and the cow barn cleaned and freshly bedded Mister Goatherder hurried to spread the fertilizer and Mrs. Goatherder skedaddled back to the house and the air conditioning.

Once all the hoopla was over with I spent the rest of the day helping to watch the many peeps as they did what young peeps do. I also spent some time wooing a few of my pretty hens. It is a busy life here in the cow barn but no worries, I am rooster enough to handle it all and still greet the day with a loud cock-a-doodle-doo!

Oh yes, before I dash back to the barn I`d like to give a hearty crow of welcome to LaFemme Roar! I hope you enjoy your visits here, even if it isn`t always a handsome rooster such as me posting.

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Thoughts From a Yodeling Puddle

Oh yes, this is me over the past few days-

Well mostly. My complexion isn`t quite that jade but my temperament has been identical. Seriously. You can ask Mister.

Dear Neptune it has been SO danged hot here I would actually enjoy getting doused with a bucket of cold water! Heck, I wouldn`t care if a certain farm girl with ruby slippers AND her little dog dumped it over my head. I have lived in these mountains for quite a spell and I cannot recall it ever being this hot so early in the summer. The past couple of days we`ve had over a hundred in the shade and the humidity….hell I don`t even want to talk about the humidity.

The goats won`t stick their noses out of the barn, can`t say as I blame them. The birds are wandering around panting and Sir Patrick of Moo stays hidden in the wooded lot of his pasture. As for Feral and her gang we`ve been trying to get done what needs done before eleven in the morning. Yesterday when I woke up at five it was eighty-two degrees. Eighty-two degrees at five in the morning! That is very, very rare up here in the hills. Usually we drop down into the sixties at night but not of late. I honestly don`t know how folks in the big city can stand these kinds of heat waves.

We three intrepid, or idiotic can`t decide which, goatherders have gotten a good chunk of our winter wood in and stacked over Mister`s vacation. And that is really about it. Trust me on this one after the last trip on Thursday no-one wanted mama outside anymore. If there is one thing I`m rather good at its bitching. Again, ask Mister. He will concur readily I`m sure.

We did venture out last night to go see Captain America but that was in an air conditioned car then sitting in a nice cool theater. The movie was a hoot. Being the Marvel comic nerd that I am of course I was thrilled to be seeing characters coming to life that I had only ever read about in my beloved comics. If anyone is looking for a great film to take the kids to see I highly recommend Cap. Although I may be just a bit biased. *Smiles sheepishly*

On another path we finally caught the rassafrassin` beast that`s been killing my ducks. I am now down to one drake thanks to a certain nasty varmint. In a last ditch effort to catch the blighter Mister placed leg-hold traps in the ducks pen. We herded my poor solo drake into his coop and locked him in tightly. Next morning when I let the dogs out I could hear Tinker braying and jogged back to wake Mister up. Right next to the duck coop he had caught a HUGE boar coon. Poor Qhuinn (That`s my drakes name) was huddled into the furthest corner of his coop when I let him out after the duck killer had been eradicated. I had to lure him out with some feed. Now he has to chum around with the geese who seem to tolerate him as long as he isn`t too close.

Darn but losing my birds, and especially my waterfowl, makes me SO mad! I know that the wild animals are only doing what they need to do to survive but still, why my ducks guys? Yeah I know, they`re easy pickings. Just like my buff silky hen Jo-Jo the Second was an easy mark for a red-tail the other day. Of course we can`t do a thing but watch the son-of-a-gun fly off but consabbit, I really liked that little golden Silky hen. That sadly is all part and parcel of having poultry I suppose. *Sighs*

So trying to end this on a more chipper note, I hope it`s been cooler where y`all are! Guess I had best get to the laundry that`s waiting so I`ll be flying off.

Now where did I put my broomstick?

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

One Liners-7/20

'Accursed paparazzi!'

As always everyone is encouraged to play along. Just put your one-liner down in the comments section!

Monday, July 18, 2011

This Doctor Makes Housecalls!

Hello and happy Monday gang!

Step inside out of the heat and we`ll have a fresh cup while we catch up. How was everyone`s weekend? Filled with fun and good times I hope. Ours was a pretty nice one despite the weather which is creeping up into the intolerable range once again. Friday night we three goatherders trundled into town to see the last of the Harry Potter movies. *Sniffles* What a grand and wonderful series of books and films those were. I`ll miss reading about Harry, Ron and Hermione. I can recall sitting down with my daughter and reading those novels together once upon a time.

The rest of the weekend raced by with cutting and hauling firewood, and man alive is my body telling me about it! This old gray mare ain`t what she used to be. I said to Mister as we were filling the stove room with last year’s leftovers to make room for the new wood something along these lines-

“You know snookie-pookie it is REALLY hot out here!”

To which he replied something akin to this-

“Yeah we`re getting warmed twice with this wood ain`t we?”

He`s such a wisenheimer at times.

Yesterday afternoon I went to a self-publishing seminar at our local indie bookstore. That was very informative and oodles of fun and really helped me a great deal. I also found an editor for my novel-in-progress! *Does happy goatherder dance*

Today is another sweltering one already and it`s only a little after ten as I`m typing this. Mister and Miss are off in the woods go fetch another wagon load of wood. I got to stay home and wait for our large animal vet Dr. Lisa to show up. The four ladies that are heading to fair in a couple of weeks need their health certificates. I mentioned to Dr. Lisa as we sauntered down to the goat barn that I only see her once a year. She commented that was a good thing and I guessed I have to agree!

Of course the girls were thrilled to have visitors and Dr. Lisa gave the fair going gals a good once-over. Now we need to get the tattooing and clipping done! I couldn`t tattoo since I didn`t get the papers from ADGA for Tali. Still don`t have them but I did manage to get a hold of the gal we bought her from last night, so Dr. Lisa at least had the tattoo numbers for the health certificate.

Clipping though…Ugh…tiny goat hairs stuck to every darn nook and crevasse (And yes I do have some crevasses) as sweat runs down through the buzzed goat hair plastered to your body. Did I say ugh yet? I did, okay, Blech! But that`s all part and parcel of showing animals. Itchy crevasses. That sounds risqué doesn`t it? Or it could be the name of a rock band! The Itchy Crevasses Live at Madison Square Garden. Gracious my mind goes off on the STRANGEST roads don`t it?

So what`s been keeping y`all busy since last we visited?

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Sharing the Evening

Yesterday the humidity finally broke and the temperature dropped thankfully! After dinner it was a perfect 70 degrees here with a lovely cool breeze. So I grabbed my camera and out we went for an evening drive and some garden duty. I thought you might want to share the evening with us, just to see what we yodeling goatherder`s do up here in the Laurel Highlands of Pennsylvania on a lovely summer eve.

Some of that new hay Mister has been working on-

Spotted her alongside the road-

Some shots of our beautiful county and landscape-

The raspberries are ripe and oh so tasty-

A little garden tending for some very thirsty plants-

Some fruits or veggies I guess I should say of our labors. A big ole cucumber-

And a little bitty squash-

And of course some tom-foolery-

Hope your evening was as pleasant as ours was! And a big yodel of welcome to Lisa Sall! Howdy Lisa! Welcome to the hillside farm!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

First Week of Mister`s Vacation

Come on in if you can get around the dogs and have a cup of iced coffee gang!

Yup, I think I`m going to be serving my beloved brew over crushed ice for a spell. It`s been hotter than two rats making whoopee in a wool sock, as my dear hubby would say, here for days! Dry, hot and humid makes for one slightly cranky Feral. I don`t do heat well. Ever since I went through ‘The Change’ I tend to be particularly touchy about hot weather. So needless to say I`ve been spending most of my time indoors, trying to keep cool in the AC. Mister though has been busier than a three-legged beaver with an over-flowing river. Hot, dry and muggy in July can only mean one thing-It`s haying time.

Since he has this week and next off for vacation he figured the time was now to get our hay in. I don`t envy the man one blessed thing either. Putting in eight to ten hours on a tractor in this weather is enough to suck all the life juices from a soul. So far he`s gotten twenty round bales cut, raked and baled with more to come, IF the rain holds off! *Crosses fingers*

We have had a new visitor arrive though over the past few days. Madame Phoebe thought that our back-porch looked like a prime nesting place!

Mister and I had different thoughts since her new nesting spot location was directly over our grill.

She made quite a mess of things and try as we may whatever we tried didn`t dissuade her.

So, knowing that we had been handed a defeat we rolled the grill out of the way and allowed her to do her thing.

She has three little eggs that she`s sitting on. We`ve been peeking daily to see if they hatch and how many. If I can get a picture of them to share I will.

Other than hay and phoebe nesting things here are pretty quiet. We are starting to get ready for fair next month. Our large animal vet Dr. Lisa is coming out next Monday to inspect the goats that are going and give us our health certificates, so we have some tattooing to do over the weekend on our new little Sable doe Tali.

So how is this hump-day treating y`all?

Sunday, July 10, 2011

One Liners-7/10

'Hello Ma`am, we`re from the Turkey Scouts! Would you be interested in buying a box of Peanut Butter Gobbles?'

As always everyone is invited to play along! Just add your one-liner in with your comments.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Fun With Numbers

Morning all, tug out a chair and have a fresh cuppa!

You know I adore numbers! And my favorite number is umpteen. It`s the most enjoyable number for a few reasons I reckon. First it`s just fun to say isn`t it? Secondly it fits so many different things in my day to day life! Seems at least once a day that silly number pops up in either mine or Mister`s conversation.

For example this is our umpteenth brood to hatch out in the cow barn.

Two mama hens did all the work, sitting side by side for three weeks. Then when the chicks began to hatch out Old Red Hen wiggled her plump little rump into things! Now those nine chicks have three mothers to fret about them. They should sure know how to be a chicken in no time flat with all that maternal attention!

Then there`s our yellow lab Poe who was first given the moniker Madame Umpteen.

You may be asking yourself’ Feral, how could such an adorable old woman like Poe have earned such an odd nickname?’ Well I`ll tell you how, after I get another swig of java juice. Ah that is good stuff! Okay, so Poe was bestowed that name way back when she was young simply because you have to tell her things umpteen times.

‘Poe, would you stop stomping on that bee`s nest?!’

‘Poe, didn`t I ask you to stop digging in the manure pile not three minutes ago?! Yes I know there are mice in there but seriously have you SEEN your paws?!’

‘Poe, are you deaf? I could have sworn I told you several times to NOT wallow in the goose pond and then come inside and leap on the couch!’

‘Poe! Poe! Poe! POE!’ (This is said umpteen times by me as I call her to the house)

Also aside from Madame Umpteen we have Lu-Lu, who I think is vying for the coveted title of Madame Umpteen-the Feline Edition. I swear on Ryan Reynolds rippled abs that I remove that cat from places she does not belong umpteen times in the course of the day. Such as-

In the base of the new turkey waterer-

In the dish drainer-

And knocking over my carefully arranged action figures! (Yes it IS important that Ironman be beside War Machine and that Nick Fury`s teeny little guns aren`t scattered hither and yon Lu-Lu! Another of my little foibles is now common knowledge.)

I could also list my dear husband in the above list of how often I use the number umpteen but we`ve already covered how many knots I`ve gotten on my head from open cupboard doors. I`ve told him about that more than umpteen times rest assured! Him and the animals listen about the same. Feral! Now that wasn`t nice at all! *Giggles impishly*Poor Mister Yodeling, he takes such abuse from me at times. Love you honey-buns! That should smooth things over don`t y`all think???

So due to the sheer number of times we use umpteen it is now our favorite number.

I ain`t really sure if that`s a good thing or not. *Scratches head and ponders*

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Freedom, batteries and Fifties

Hello all and happy day after the 4th!

I hope everyone had a fun and safe holiday. Our three day weekend was a full one but a nice one! We goatherders weren`t the only ones to be feeling some independence either! Our meat turkeys are finally old enough to be let out and boy howdy are they enjoying themselves! We keep them inside until they`re feathered out, just in case a rain blows up.

I know some folks have heard that old saying that turkeys are so dumb they`ll look up into a rain and drown. From what I`ve read that isn`t true, what happens is that poults will get soaked and go into shock. One of the signs of shock is that their heads will tip back, so I can see how that saying got started. That`s not to say that domestic turkeys are Einstein`s by any means!

So far I`ve taken various bits of trash and plastic from their beaks, it`s like having six two year olds running through the yard! Although they did do Mister a favor! He was out front chatting with one of his buddies when he saw one of the turkeys running around with something. Over he went to take it from the bird and lo and behold that turkey had a fifty dollar bill in its beak!! True story I swear. The bill is kind of mildewed but that didn`t stop my husband from cramming it into his wallet so fast I barely saw the face of the president on it!

Sunday we went to my sister-in-laws for a family cookout. I was all sorts of set to snap some pictures, even making sure I took fresh batteries out of the charger before we left. I sat and waited for the rest of the kinfolk to arrive, since everyone just loves having their pictures in the blog she typed sardonically. I had a good one all lined up only to find out my camera wouldn`t work. I snapped and cussed and snapped and nothing! Then Mister took the camera and popped the batteries out. Oh the look he gave me then. You ladies know the look.

“What?” I asked.

“These batteries aren`t rechargeable,” he said and showed me the words LITHIUM clearly stamped on the sides of the AA`s. Well color me sheepish.

“Well they were in the charger!” I huffed as I crammed my camera into my front pocket.

So no pictures of the cookout due to poor battery labeling, the words were too small for my bifocals to read clearly. That’s my excuse and I`m sticking to it!

Yesterday we had a nice day at home and cooked some hot dogs on the grill for dinner. We had thoughts of going to the fireworks down at the lake, but Mister had to be up at three this morning to go back to work. I did get some housecleaning done yesterday so I figure today is a free day right? Miss Yodeling has one of her friends over today. She and he are back there in her room playing video games at the moment so Mama is going to sit back, sip some coffee and do some blog catching up!

How was your holiday weekend??

Monday, July 4, 2011

Friday, July 1, 2011

One Liners-7/1

"Move over, the foam from the goat milk is mine!"