When we fall in love, it's a wondrous, giddy thing. We spin in circles of merriment, sigh a lot, get rushes of excitement just hearing our beloved's name, and feel lightheaded when in the company of that special someone. Not unlike being a hockey fan now that I think about it.
Little things that are cute and endearing when dating become measurably less cute after twenty-four years of wedded bliss, trust me. Now don't get me wrong, I love my husband. He is one the funniest, hardest-working and loving men on the planet. He is also a rabid channel-flipper. I, on the other hand, find a channel and then lay the remote down because I won't need it until my show, or game, is over.
This is not just a sports thing with him, this is any show we watch. Things get downright nasty during The Walking Dead when we come back from a channel flip to discover we've missed something vital and a leading character is now dinner.
So, imagine trying to watch a hockey game with him in control of the remote. It's taxing to put it mildly. He dislikes listening to the chit-chat between periods so he flips the channel. As soon as he does this, my gaze jackknifes to the clock on the wall. And yes, he also does this when his Bruins are playing, so it's not just to bust this Rangers fans chops.
"The game will be back on in twenty minutes," I remind him.
I bury my nose into my Kindle and pretend I'm not checking the tiny clock on my e-Reader every two minutes. When the timer in my head goes off I clear my throat.
"I know, we have time," he says then continues to watch the middle of a movie he's seen forty-two times before.
"Honey, no we don't have time. Can we check the game?"
I can hear his eyes roll but he flips and finds a commercial. Back we go to the movie, or some show about how they make light bulbs, or the series starring two yahoos with metal detectors. I'm getting antsy now.
"Babe, the game must be back on. Can we please flip back?"
"Yep, right after I see how they put the wire in the light bulb. Isn't that interesting?"
"No, darling, it really isn't. The Rangers are interesting."
He huffs dramatically and flips back to the game. We find that we have missed five minutes, fifteen goals have been scored, a major fight has occurred, and Kevin Kline had broken into an impromptu rendition of I'm Just a Gal Who Cain't Say No from Oklahoma after talking with Pierre McGuire in a rare mid-game on-ice musical interview.
"Huh, guess it came back on sooner than it usually does," he says.
I cannot type what I say in return.