Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Radio Ga-Ga

Yes, I stole that line from the awesomely fantastic group Queen, but it really fits this post. Come on in gang, drop down and I`ll pour you a fresh cuppa!

First, before I get going on the radio story, I hope everyone in blog-land had a great holiday season! Christmas on the hillside farm was a grand one. Seems we all must have been exceptionally good this year. Me in particular, but I`m always good so that`s no surprise. *Whistles innocently* Santa brought me a new range! Now I won`t have to lie on the floor to light the pilot for the stove anymore! That floor gets lower and lower every year for some odd reason. I also cleaned up in the Grecian department, with a new calendar all about ancient Greece and the movie ‘The Eagle’ which I saw in the theater and adored. Can a woman have too much Greek in her life? I think not.

Okay, so now, let`s get to the drama of my morning. Today was another physical therapy day for my mother-in-law, so down I go around 8:30 this morning to fix her coal stove and gather her up. I hadn`t warmed up my truck since I didn`t realize how cold it was. Yeah, I had been out to do chores earlier but that don`t count. I was still warmed internally by java juice.

We head down the road, chatting away about this and that, when I realize that my beloved classic rock radio station isn`t on. GASP! Has someone dared to touch the knob?! I couldn`t imagine it, since turning the radio knob is a crime punishable by several hours of harping. Not meaning to be rude, but now beginning to get twitchy, I reached over and cranked the volume up in the middle of what my mother-in-law was saying. I smiled at her and mumbled something about music. Nothing came from the speakers but static. I began to perspire.

“Oh, this is bad.” I said and fiddled with the knob, fine-tuning desperately. “The Met is off the air!”

“Guess you`ll have to listen to hillbilly music,” my mother-in-law commented.

My eyes widened. The truck weaved just slightly as I kept fiddling. Now don`t get me wrong country music fans, I sort-of enjoy country tunes if they`re the old performers. Conway Twitty, George Jones, Johnny Cash, Freddy Fender, you know? The stuff my mother listened to while I was growing up and trying to drown out her music with KISS and YES. It`s just, to me, all these new country singers sound the same. I`m sure folks that aren`t into rock or metal say the same thing about those genres too, though.

“Uhm,” I brilliantly replied and began searching for a rock station with desperation. “There`s got to be another classic rock station somewhere.”

Well, sadly, it seems there isn`t in this neck of the woods. There are a hundred and fifty-three country stations, one classical music station, and several stations that play rap/pop/dance or whatever the Sam Hill kids call their tunes nowadays. I flew past someone who sounded like that Beiber kid as if Satan himself was the disc jockey. As the panic set in I landed on a station that was playing something that sounded like a woman singing while mixing a cake with the blender set on warp nine. I think it might have been some new club song. Either that or she had her booby caught in that warp nine blender. I began to have mild palpitations and my mouth felt dry.

“Zeppelin,” I coughed weakly. “Must………..find……..Zeppelin.”

Fortunately, through all this gasping, wheezing and general hysteria (Ah Def Leppard, where were you when I needed you the most?) my mother-in-law was, as always, pleasant and non-judgmental. She simply watched me mumbling incoherently then smiled when I cussed out the truck driver behind me who was getting antsy as I drove and searched for some rock music. Finally, by the grace of the gods of rock and roll, I stumbled into a radio station that was playing The Monkees. Granted, that group isn`t The Who but it was much better than Justin Beiber. I sighed. Then the next song came on. It was Billy Joel. I began to weep silently and turned the damned radio off.

“We`ll just talk,” I muttered, to which, my mother-in-law smiled once more and nodded.


dr momi said...

Thanks for your caption over at Homesteading At Redtail Ridge! (it's ok to link back to you next week when I highlight all the captions -- yes?)

*smirky smile* I would listen to country LOL!

TexWisGirl said...

oh lordy, vickie, you're a mess!

V.L. Locey said...

Hi dr momi! Sure! Link away!

I know it TexWis.

small farm girl said...

Oh, the horror!!!!!!

Texan said...

mmm well ... so okay talking can be good sometimes, right? ROFL

V.L. Locey said...

Oh the joy! 95 The Met is back on the air this morning. *Collapses in relief*