Thursday, February 18, 2010

He shoots! He scores!!!!!

Did you ever laugh so hard about something so silly you couldn`t breathe properly??

I`ll admit I`m very susceptible to gasping silly attacks, they seem to strike me without warning and over the most random things! I`ve rolled off my daughter`s bed over a video game character`s inability to pick up a dropped sword. Yes, the things that tickle my fancy are sometimes hard to explain to those who are regarding me with an arched brow.

I had to pass this along to y`all since I found it to be riotous to the point of nearly collapsing to the kitchen floor. It may even help shed some light on the odd tilt my mental wheels seem to run on.

Last Saturday Mister Yodeling and I had the joy of taking our yellow lab Poe to the vet`s for her yearly boosters. Poe dislikes the vet, her office, the air surrounding her office and the very clouds that blow over said office. Anxiety thy name is Poe. She shakes and shivers and whines and cries. Then we go inside and it escalates proportionately the longer we have to wait.

By the time we have to drag her into the consultation room the poor dog has herself worked into a fine and nervous tizzy. Needless to say we usually don`t linger and chat with our good doctor of veterinary medicine but this time we did. I think I`ve mentioned Poe`s hip dysplasia in the story I penned about her a bit ago. This winter seemed to be a particularly bad one for her so it was decided to try giving her some different medication on a 2 week trial basis.

Now you and I have all heard that saying about dumb animals, and there are some that are pretty dim bulbs *Stares at turkeys*but this dog, she is smarter than she should be. Much smarter than Mister and I wish she were at times. Poe has always been a persnickety dog, turning her nose up to people food that our other two inhale without chewing. She also has an amazing ability to eat whatever the pill or aspirin may be in and yet leaves the ‘hiding chunk’ behind. With her oral skills she should be a politician. Feral! Behave!

Perhaps today was just one of those days, I truly don`t know. It was a long one for sure. Mister Yodeling`s workplace is having a few down days so we were up and outside by 7:30 AM to begin processing four wethers from last year’s kidding season. We got the first half of the butchering done, grabbed a very fast lunch then ran to Wal-Mart for groceries and to do some birthday shopping for Miss Yodeling, who`s special day is the end of this month. Back home, evening chores and supper.

By the time dinner was over tonight I was tired and slipping dangerously close to becoming slap-happy, a sure sign of fatigue for me as my family can attest to if asked. Now since we got the new doggie meds Mister has been hiding Poe`s half a Deramaxx into a small ball of whatever he`s eating for dinner. With the other two dogs circling like sharks she usually hurries his special offering down. Tonight Mister forgot her dinner pill offering.

“No worries,” he said,” I`ll fool her.”

“Good luck with that,” I muttered as I began to wash the dishes.

The simple trick, which he should have known wouldn`t work since it never has before, turned into something that would have made the Three Stooges proud.*Pauses and counts family members then shrugs*

First thing he attempted was wadding the pill half in some stale chicken bread. She spit the chunk of bread and the half a pill to the floor. There was a mad rush to dive on the soggy bread so the other two canine piranha don`t eat it. Then the old ‘Slather the bread with peanut butter’ ruse was attempted. She smacked and licked and ran into the living room to spit the pill onto the carpet. Not to be dissuaded my hubby then tugged out the ‘Slide pill into a chunk of hot dog’ trick. The same trick Harry Houdini attempted to use on his dog, who also caught the medicated wiener in the air then expectorated it to Houdini`s linoleum. (Okay, I made that up but it could have happened!)

Needless to say once the ketchup came out to make the next chunk of hot dog more enticing Poe was having none of it. Mister tossed the well-condimented wiener skyward, Poe cocked a brow, the chunk hit the floor, the two wrong canine`s dashed for it. Poe was making a break for the living room and in the flail of twelve dog feet and two sized- ten man feet the chunk of hot dog was kicked like a soccer ball beneath the coat closet in my kitchen. The look of exasperation on my dear hubby`s face pushed me firmly onto the Main Street of Loopyville, which is the next county over from Margaritaville but less salty.

“Weiner…….soccer,” I roared with my head lying on my soapy hands by the kitchen sink.

Man oh day, I guess I had best turn in early tonight huh? Weiner soccer! *Snickers like a wooly goose*


houndstooth said...

I can see the whole scene pictured clearly in my head! It's not just you, I think it's funny as hell and I'd have been on the floor holding my sides and trying not to snort as I laughed! All I can say is that this is the result of the dread Y Chromosome Disorder that all men suffer from!

Yoda & Brutus said...

Sounds like a sketch out of a sitcom! BOL!! Mom hides our medicine in marshmallows :)

Pugs & Kisses,

Yoda & Brutus

Brenda said...

Very Very funny! I can't quit laughing! I can picture the whole thing ... you describe it very well indeed!

Feral Female said...

Thanks ladies and pugs! =)

That Y chromosone disorder surely is a severe problem at times isn`t it?

Flat Creek Farm said...

Another funny! So very cute, and yes, I can picture it all. Seriously, Feral, you need to write a book. You are quite gifted at this! :) -Tammy

from my front porch... said...

LOL LOL! Hilarious!! Something my hubby would do for sure!
I have to pass this on!

Texan said...

LOL funny :O)

Nezzy said...

Ain't nothin' like live entertainment while doin' the dishes! Heeeheehe!

Have a fun day and a wonderfully blessed weekend!!!